I can't help it people. I'm totally laughing my ass off at Britney's Fed-Ex. It has been the most hysterical, trashy divorce in years. Even Whitney and Bobby are more low key than these two. Fed-Ex is still rapping however I suspect the lyrics have changed. Read the following excerpt from IdontLikeYouInThat Way. Todd's lines are side splitting.

"Instead of flying to Miami, Fed-ex arrived in a bus - along with six friends. On Tuesday, they went on a "shopping trip" on Lincoln Road but "didn't buy anything" and then had dinner at "cheap" Oriente at Cardozo on Ocean Drive before stopping by club Mansion, where everything was comped." ~Page Six

"Being a rap legend isn't just about being shot or going to prison, it's also about blowing all your money. Since he's now lost his only source of income, K-Fed is now a baller on a budget.
No word on how much K-Fed got for giving blood or the bag of empty cans, but it's good to finally see this idiot suffer. A week ago, he was fully content to blow every dime of Britney's money, now he's writing lyrics by a bonfire. Once his album goes gold in 50 years he'll be on easy street, but until then, he needs to go ahead and learn how much Armor All I like on my tires." ~Todd IDLYITW

More Hate Flying Fed-Ex's Way...

* "This guy is such a tool. He's like the most hated man in America for turning Britney from hot blonde pinup to dumpy barefoot child-endangering Cheeto inhaler." ~ J. Harvey, A Socialite's Life

* "I think you've got the title of K-Fed's next album right there. And don't miss his hit single "You Can't Hang Wit Dis (Would You Like Fries Wit Dat?)" ~ Anonymous

* "I still can't believe that this moron let the only big payday (Britney)that he'll EVER see get away...should have bought a kareoke machine and "kept it real" in the living room of their mansion...DUMBASS." ~ Anonymous

* "KFed's not broke. Just look at his 'fit and his bling.
The cap, shirt, jeans, shoes and rope has to total AT LEAST $28.55.
Dude, that's like 8 Red Bulls.
CHA CHING!" ~ Anon

Ahh the good days. It's fun shopping with other people's money, right Kev?

Photo's via: A Socialite's Life

* "Kevin Federline was informed by text message that his studding and couch-warming services would no longer be required at the Spears Malibu compound." ~ Defamer

The comments are hysterical. I can't believe what people come up with. Just one more I swear!

* "It's a credit to both of them that the increasingly ugly dissolution of their marriage has not discouraged them from getting out of the house, where, presumably, their two infant children have by now figured out how to unlock the barricades on their cribs, overturned their replenishing Petco food and water dispensers, and are currently bravely attempting their first steps at the top of a large, marble staircase." ~ Defamer